Airplane of Love
22 Jul 2010 Leave a Comment
in LOA
My friend and I were riding in my car the other day, and she asked me how I am. Like, existentially, “how are you Marian?” And to my surprise, the story that popped out of my mouth was, “well, I’ve just gotten a bunch of things that I have been asking for for a long time, and I am feeling a little bit overwhelmed, but happy.” I had never really said it to myself that way before, although it felt true and good — I can think of all kinds of ways that is true. Before I said it that way, though, I hadn’t really owned it, and the part that I was mostly feeling was “I’m overwhelmed.” But yeah, the other side of that is that a lot of my wishes are coming true, and I am bedazzled and I am happy and I am thankful!
That story feels better to me than overwhelm. I want to tweak it a little more. How about — all kinds of things are lining up for me. I can see them right now. I am not used to allowing so much creative life force energy to flow through me, but it is the most wonderful thing that I have ever experienced. When I feel overwhelmed, I will remind myself that I don’t have to ‘do’ anything for it to be good — it already is good. My job, primarily, is to vibrate with love. That’s where all the clarity, good ideas, the beautiful music, the uplifting stories, the prosperity and peace and people I love, and me, my higher self, and everything that I want — that is where it all is. That is the airplane! It’s much more work, and much more overwhelming/insecure/dangerous to be dangling by your fingernails just outside the airplane than to be sitting inside the airplane, even though in both cases you’d be going the same speed.
I am on a mission. A mission to be squarely in love. No two ways about it, just love love love.
Appreciate the wanting
25 Apr 2010 Leave a Comment
in LOA
A couple of days ago I made a list of “everything that I want”. It is only two pages long. One of the things I wrote on it is “I want to never take anyone or anything for granted.”
I realized today that one of the things that I sometimes take for granted is WANTING. I want. My dad used to say in a finger-shakey way that there is no “enough”, that no matter how much people have they will always want more. But why is that a bad thing? Sometimes I tell myself I should just be happy with what I have, why do I have to want so much? But the thing is, I am happy with what I have AND I want. Wanting is something that I can appreciate, too. I mean, what would happen if one didn’t want anything? That would be pretty boring! And it is so much sweeter to get something if you have wanted it first. If you never wanted it to begin with, then it wouldn’t seem particularly special. If you were born and had everything just perfect so you could sit around and enjoy it…? *yawn* No one does that! Everyone wants something. I think it is great to want. It is a sign of vitality and enthusiasm and eagerness to live life.
I am a want-er, and I am proud of it! And let it never be said that I don’t know what I want. I might not know EVERYTHING I want but I do know quite a few things that I definitely want. And I have learned about who I am not, as well as who I am, and who I am becoming. My inner being just says “more and more and more and more and more and more and more.”
The Paradox of Selfishness and Altruism
17 Apr 2010 Leave a Comment
in LOA
On the heels of the last post, I am going to talk about a concept that seems to create a lot of confusion: the difference between selfishness and altruism.
We all probably know someone who may not feel inherently valuable and therefore feels the need to earn their value by taking care of others, even at the expense of themselves. Taken to an extreme, this energetic outpouring is downright martyrdom. “I toil and grind away for you, and this is my cross to bear, and if I don’t do it no one else will, and life is suffering” etc. But you’d better believe it, they will remind you of all the things they did for you, that you probably didn’t ask them to do, the next time they want you to do something. The truth is, that kind of altruism is selfish, because it is prone to resentment and seeks external validation. It is not sustainable.
True altruism is totally “selfish” in that it is a natural outpouring of personal happiness. When you are happy, that is when you are connected to all your power — the divine, unlimited energy of the universe. You have unlimited resources, and so giving things to others doesn’t hurt. You give freely, because it makes you happy. You’re happy, and in doing things that make you happy, you make others happy, which makes you happy. (For example.)
You’re never going to be sad enough to make the sad people happy, and never going to be struggling enough to make the struggle easier for others. The truth is, taking care of yourself, being happy, being “selfish” so to speak, is the most altruistic thing that you can do.
Work Schmirk
13 Apr 2010 1 Comment
Lately I have been pondering an idea that seems rather against the grain of mainstream thought, but the more I think about it the more sense it makes to me.
I have lost faith in the value of hard work. Hmm, let me put that in a stronger way:
I don’t believe in hard work.
*Gasp!* How anti-American! How sexy, how beatnik, how totally rebellious. But I don’t mean it in a rebellious sort of way. In fact, I do believe in a lot of other things. I believe in attention, I believe in focus, I believe in fascination, and cultivated awareness and consciousness and presence. I believe in flow. But here is what I do not believe in: I do not believe in self-flagellation, or noses to grindstones. Poor noses! I do not believe in making yourself do something against your own will. What is that, anyway? It undermines your self-esteem and makes you feel powerless. Worse, I think that we have developed this idea in our collective psyche that “moar werk = bettar”. All that stuff out there, all that stuff we want, if we deserved it we would already have it, so maybe if we work really really hard, we’ll deserve it. Guess what — doing something that you don’t want to do is a lot of freakin’ work! And then amazingly, we find that foom, our lives are a whole lot work and struggle. It’s difficult to admit it, but we totally asked for it. And the more we struggle, the more complicated it gets, and the more moving pieces we have to look out for and the more out of control we feel and we get overwhelmed with the feeling of Everything Out There and if it would only behave, and why do some people have it so easy and what did we do to deserve all of this and maybe if we just work harder…
Do you really think that that single mother of five, working from dawn to dusk to hold up the sky of her life and our world deserves less than the CEO of a fortune 500 company? Does she work any less? Most people don’t think so, but they feel bad when they think about it so they make up all sorts of stories to explain the disparity, most of which involve placing blame somewhere… on her, on society, on the currency system or the economy or the government.
I also don’t believe in blame, but that’s a rant for another day.
So, Marian, miss know-it-all, if you know all the answers are wrong, what is the answer hmm?
The answer is 42.
Well, I’m just saying that work is an arbitrary, relative thing that we do and it’s correlated with our expectations and inner sense of worth. And when we relax our grip just a tiny bit, on trying to micromanage the details, and instead try to feel around for the place closer in proximity, or even *in* LOVE, then the work disappears and the we’re moving in a place of passion.
Have you ever been in love? Have you ever seen how much in-love gets done? Have you driven four hours to have sex in the woods with your lover at 4am because you just couldn’t NOT do it? If you didn’t want to do it, it would be a lot of work!
That’s all I’m saying. More sex in the woods, less work.
Related: An Apology for Idlers by Robert Lewis Stevenson
The Quote of the Day for today, by Abraham-Hicks:
Most people have a hard time delegating, or even wanting to delegate, because you have been justifying your existence through your hard work, and you equate success with struggle; you equate results with struggle. And so, you sort of wear your struggle like a badge of honor. And all of that is opposite of allowing the Well-being. The only thing that ever matters in success or achievement is your achieving the things that you want to achieve. So if you are setting standards and you’re feeling uncomfortable about the standards that you’ve set, tweak the standards back a little bit. Ratchet it back a notch. Give yourself a break. Give yourself the benefit of the doubt. Lighten up. Be easier. Go slower. Take it easy. Have more fun. Love yourself more. Laugh more. Appreciate more. All is well. You can’t get it wrong. You never get it done.
